Addressing a group of Young Fabians last night, Ed Balls spoke with honesty and candour of the record of the previous government. “We got it wrong”, he announced to an audience stunned in silence.
Shadow Chancellor Ed Balls today retaliated to claims from an unnamed source that he was ‘the most annoying person in politics.’
“I am indeed the most annoying person in politics. Brown, Blair, Lumley, all the big names agree, I am just really annoying.”
“My brothers and sisters, you are the next generation of annoying politicians. One day you will be rubbing shoulders with Martin Luther King,
In a move aimed to quash speculation that he was annoying, Yvette Balls-Cooper gave an unnamed source a video to give to a national newspaper exclusive footage of the family’s last Christmas, which he spent largely in the spare room sulking after a fraught game of Monopoly with Labour Party figures. Former Transport Secretary Geoff Hoon refused to stop at any of the train stops out of guilt, Ed Miliband nicked his brother’s hotels and everyone refused to pay the fines to the banker, instead insisting on putting it on their Parliamentary expenses.